https://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.socialhttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3ml6nlxw6hk2qI always know when someone has a small dick.06 May 2026 11:59 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3ml6nlxw6hk2qhttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3ml6lfle4ic2qThe Times framing this as a “help” is just the times laundering this administration’s destructive behaviour for the mass audiences [contains quote post or other embedded content]06 May 2026 11:19 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3ml6lfle4ic2qhttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3ml4zfbnq2s2dMy spouse’s cousin recently shared with the family that she is trans. Her journey has been a long one. Recently, she’s posted on threads about where her chosen names came from and apparently her first name came from my MIL. Most any person with half a heart would be honored. But. 1/205 May 2026 20:24 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3ml4zfbnq2s2dhttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3ml35bglvqs22When your 2y8m finds the perfect frequency to scream at you trigger instant headaches and you just keep saying “sweetheart I need you to use a smaller voice so the baby isn’t upset.” https://media.tenor.com/7veJmrCmrCsAAAAC/pengu-pudgy.gif?hh=300&ww=30005 May 2026 02:28 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3ml35bglvqs22https://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3ml2g54bo2k23Big time disappointing from WotC. Unsurprising, sadly, as of late. But utterly disappointing. [contains quote post or other embedded content]04 May 2026 19:34 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3ml2g54bo2k23https://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mkyhlebx3s2zLook, I’m all in on any and all references to Toys, but we’re interviewing Barry Levinson on Toys before we’re ending homelessness. https://www.cnn.com/2026/05/03/entertainment/toys-movie-barry-levinson-modern-warfare-cec?Date=20260503&Profile=cnn&utm_content=1777812094&utm_medium=social&utm_source=threads04 May 2026 00:55 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mkyhlebx3s2zhttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mky7ionhf22mToddler who didn’t nap? Check. Two week old baby? Check. Post-partum mom with multiple re-admittances? Check. We are tired, yall.03 May 2026 22:30 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mky7ionhf22mhttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mkxw4z37ns2xMy eldest already peeking behind the veil and noticing that Mr Rogers wore his inside shoes at the music shop in his neighborhood, which is NOT inside his house. I’m never gonna slip anything past this kid. Pray to zeus for me.03 May 2026 19:43 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mkxw4z37ns2xhttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mkxevhbzt22eI’m tired of my choices in elected officials either being the “we need to put babies in the baby crushing machine” party and the “we need to means test to find a smaller number of babies to feed to the baby crushing machine” party. How about we just not fucking crush babies?03 May 2026 14:34 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mkxevhbzt22ehttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mkx4sqcbds2kI can’t buy fucking jarts anymore, but OpenAI can tell you how to commit mass murder. Cool. Cool cool cool. [contains quote post or other embedded content]03 May 2026 12:09 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mkx4sqcbds2khttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mkx4prbnk22kI’m not proud of the amount of screen time my eldest is getting, but it’s at least exclusively Sesame Street, and 80% classic Sesame Street (before Elmo occupied a third of an episode’s runtime).03 May 2026 12:08 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mkx4prbnk22khttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mkiv6b7ufc2tHaving a newborn and a toddler in your 40s ends up leaving you like Jason Statham in crank27 Apr 2026 20:15 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mkiv6b7ufc2thttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mkfnxswbc22yAnd on the 6th day at mgh, my brain starts singing, to the tune of “Tommy can you hear me?” “Coffee can you hear me Can you caffeinate me now Coffee can you fill me And keep me vibrating now Coffee coffee coffee coffee…”26 Apr 2026 13:29 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mkfnxswbc22yhttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mk64hgvq4c2eHelp a friend out, if you can? [contains quote post or other embedded content]23 Apr 2026 13:27 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mk64hgvq4c2ehttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mk63mbqioc2eI’ve been a life long fan of Peter Gabriel and i still forget sometimes how much he cooks.23 Apr 2026 13:11 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mk63mbqioc2ehttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mk3ptfncgc2dThe wargames desire to yell “hold the door! Hold the door! Hold the goddamed door!” When I try to catch an elevator22 Apr 2026 14:35 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mk3ptfncgc2dhttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mjyvjtznec2xMy kid was born before the elite runners crossed the finish line yesterday, so I’ve decided that the little love won Boston!21 Apr 2026 11:39 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mjyvjtznec2xhttps://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mjoxecwlos22A house down the road has flown an absurd amount of tiny USA flags for a long time. Recently, they added a “250 years of freedom” flag. That flag kept me wondering “freedom for who” until the obvious next flag went out: a gadsen flag. Of fucking course.17 Apr 2026 12:45 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mjoxecwlos22https://bsky.app/profile/asalsman.bsky.social/post/3mjo2ht7dec2nAt almost 46, I have a well rounded group of friends and acquaintances (and acquaintances who I would do friend-level dead-body disappearing for). So when I see certain things liked by these people, I know I’m seeing something valuable and important. And occasionally completely chaotic.17 Apr 2026 04:08 +0000at://did:plc:b6q3f7dsfgwupvzrul4yjxie/app.bsky.feed.post/3mjo2ht7dec2n