professional amateur/poaster's apprentice if I bother you, tell me to go work on my book no, i'm not Ellie Lockhart's kid mrsomerton.substack.comhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.socialhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mvzhhf5mo22jNEW ON SUBSTACK: 15 people, from all walks of life, present their opinions on one of the biggest issues of our time; AI... okay, I lied. none of these people actually exist. but their opinions on the other hand, very much are. enjoy… whatever this is, at the link below... https://mrsomerton.substack.com/p/mrsomerton-presents-15-perspectives21 Sep 2026 10:02 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mvzhhf5mo22jhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mvgxadvt2s2wNEW ON SUBSTACK: Freedom Fuel, the station selling gas at "patriotically low prices" has garnered the endorsement of President Trump. But, what, exactly, is its deal? Trust me, I would like to know as well. Find out the Freedom Fuel scoop down below: https://mrsomerton.substack.com/p/what-in-the-world-is-freedom-fuel14 Sep 2026 01:24 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mvgxadvt2s2whttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mvgw66tle22hi mean, if they're gonna talk about streamers, they should at the very least talk about more than one i want CBS talking about Asmongold. i want the New York Times covering H3 vs Hasan. I want CNN doing a roundtable about Destiny. if you're going to pretend streamer bullshit matters, go all the way [contains quote post or other embedded content]14 Sep 2026 01:05 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mvgw66tle22hhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mvgvnyvztk22there's no way to prove this schmuck wasn't greenscreened in from the local bar [contains quote post or other embedded content]14 Sep 2026 00:56 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mvgvnyvztk22https://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mvgv2xumpc2udon't say microscope up the ass, don't say microscope up the ass.... [contains quote post or other embedded content]14 Sep 2026 00:45 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mvgv2xumpc2uhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3muxv4ekcac2lNEW ON SUBSTACK: for the (probably none of) you who read Part 1 of The Nerve, I now present: Part 2 of The Nerve! *count von count voice* AH AH AH! (no, but seriously, please read this, I would really appreciate it) https://mrsomerton.substack.com/p/the-nerve-part-208 Sep 2026 01:36 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3muxv4ekcac2lhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mupra42w622rhad to rep for my crew [contains quote post or other embedded content]04 Sep 2026 20:06 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mupra42w622rhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mtub2xush22wNEW ON SUBSTACK: the following is a preview of a much longer article coming out next week, enjoy! https://mrsomerton.substack.com/p/the-2026-nfl-season-in-32-sentences24 Aug 2026 21:34 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mtub2xush22whttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mta24vebkk2o https://docs.google.com/document/d/1VyVF5JKzrdt61iYZOGt-Iefx3_SmE8NxgJPkf2d71rc/edit?usp=sharing16 Aug 2026 20:37 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mta24vebkk2ohttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mtcjai3ylc2qwe are sick and tired of the feminization of our leopards. they should start eating people’s faces again, like real men do [contains quote post or other embedded content]17 Aug 2026 20:13 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mtcjai3ylc2qhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt7o5yjhck2cNEW ON SUBSTACK: the following is part 1 of a story i’ve been working on for quite some time…. hope you enjoy! https://mrsomerton.substack.com/p/the-nerve-prologuepart-116 Aug 2026 17:03 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt7o5yjhck2chttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mtcdgm7os22d [contains quote post or other embedded content]17 Aug 2026 18:29 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mtcdgm7os22dhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mqdouq3aqk2vif you're reading this go to bed11 Jul 2026 03:11 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mqdouq3aqk2vhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mta24vebkk2o https://docs.google.com/document/d/1VyVF5JKzrdt61iYZOGt-Iefx3_SmE8NxgJPkf2d71rc/edit?usp=sharing16 Aug 2026 20:37 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mta24vebkk2ohttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt7zxm4ppc2oSHOCKING NEWS: the Bluesky Elite (tm) is trying to keep you, the American People, from exercising your God-given right to read @eleanor.lockhart.contact's profile. call your congressman today!16 Aug 2026 20:34 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt7zxm4ppc2ohttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt7o5yjhck2cNEW ON SUBSTACK: the following is part 1 of a story i’ve been working on for quite some time…. hope you enjoy! https://mrsomerton.substack.com/p/the-nerve-prologuepart-116 Aug 2026 17:03 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt7o5yjhck2chttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt2jcoiud22nI think what it comes down to is that a lot of journalists like the idea of being crusaders on the front lines. they want to be the brave guy standing in front of the dangerous president and exuding their Brave Journalist Vibes at him so naturally they had a vested bias against President Normal [contains quote post or other embedded content]14 Aug 2026 15:53 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt2jcoiud22nhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt7hfoplo22bof course there's a fucking Bluesky outage the MOMENT i come back. God is real and He's sending me a message16 Aug 2026 15:02 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt7hfoplo22bhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt7grj6chk2gthe Penn Station track layout looks cursed as hell. could probably summon Cthulhu with this thing16 Aug 2026 14:51 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt7grj6chk2ghttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt7g7scfvk2g*logs back in to Bluesky*16 Aug 2026 14:41 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt7g7scfvk2ghttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt3jp74fkc2zreally, I think @hellspatisserie.bsky.social said it best on the other site: [contains quote post or other embedded content]15 Aug 2026 01:32 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt3jp74fkc2zhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt2jxjmbj22cok, i'm taking another break. i'm still not convinced I shouldn't deactivate, not gonna lie. see you later this weekend, I guess14 Aug 2026 16:04 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt2jxjmbj22chttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt2jsufngc24and now he's trying to claim that the trash bin man was the "establishment candidate". no, seriously [contains quote post or other embedded content]14 Aug 2026 16:02 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt2jsufngc24https://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt2jcoiud22nI think what it comes down to is that a lot of journalists like the idea of being crusaders on the front lines. they want to be the brave guy standing in front of the dangerous president and exuding their Brave Journalist Vibes at him so naturally they had a vested bias against President Normal [contains quote post or other embedded content]14 Aug 2026 15:53 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt2jcoiud22nhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt2j22srok2nam I crazy or does this not mean anything? I just do not see the correlation here14 Aug 2026 15:48 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt2j22srok2nhttps://bsky.app/profile/mrsomerton.bsky.social/post/3mt2iqullkc2yAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAbgywEbhjahgswjuhybkugtrj14 Aug 2026 15:43 +0000at://did:plc:ivn5reqeu2eg2pjdotqgyj6c/app.bsky.feed.post/3mt2iqullkc2y