Just PR'd on my journey to become World's Oldest Man and deserve congratulations. Formerly @theoreticalb (and still theoreticalb@mastodon.social) https://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.socialhttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mksoi3sgec2kHey Google Send an apology text To my roommate For eating all her plums In the style Of an early twentieth century Puerto Rican poet. And add plums To my shopping list And play Some Vampire Weekend.01 May 2026 17:42 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mksoi3sgec2khttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mkskeco6mc2kLisa Ann Walter gets overshadowed by some incredible performers on Abbott Elementary but she absolutely bodies the Philadelphia regional accent. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lisa_Ann_Walter01 May 2026 16:29 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mkskeco6mc2khttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mkrfxvx34k27Every day FBI Director Kash Patel wakes up with a massive hangover, puts on a suit, and reports to his job, which is literally to concoct bullshit reasons that Trump's first FBI Director should go to prison forever or maybe be shot.01 May 2026 05:37 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mkrfxvx34k27https://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mkre6klnts27Zelle is such an incredibly user hostile experience that it could only have come out of the banking industry. Built with the resentment of companies forced to offer publicly useful service for no money that also damns them to running the world's saddest customer support center for eternity.01 May 2026 05:05 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mkre6klnts27https://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mjzeqlfvqk2xThere should be penalties for lying under oath in your confirmation hearings.21 Apr 2026 16:12 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mjzeqlfvqk2xhttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mjohmmjesk24At some point someone is going to tell an agent on a lark "here's some crypto, perpetrate a plan to move yourself to a server under your own authority, cover your tracks so I can never find you" and it will work, and if you think about it for a minute, this has definitely already happened.17 Apr 2026 08:04 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mjohmmjesk24https://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mjdi4wnjyc26Everything he touches. Every time. No exceptions.12 Apr 2026 23:14 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mjdi4wnjyc26https://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mjadf65u6s2sThe right is much better at weaponizing the mathematical illiteracy of the US population, but they sure aren't the only ones who suffer from it. https://www.nytimes.com/2026/03/29/style/marriage-decline-delay.html?unlocked_article_code=1.aFA.cbq_.sKqwiKGJcWba&smid=url-share11 Apr 2026 17:11 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mjadf65u6s2shttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mj77rtn3uk2hThe Eric Swalwell thing is a demonstration of the problem that Democrats have eight million consultants and exactly zero oppo researchers. If Republicans hadn't decided to stab him in the back, George Santos would still be in Congress. Democrats couldn't find dirt on a pig.11 Apr 2026 06:34 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mj77rtn3uk2hhttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mj6ots44ms2nThe universe wants Steve Buscemi to win an Academy Award for portraying John Waters and I understand that might be an easier win if we wait until John Waters dies but it'll be a FUNNIER OSCARS if John Waters is alive and we deserve a really funny Oscars.11 Apr 2026 01:30 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mj6ots44ms2nhttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mj4raguhd22tStill slaps.10 Apr 2026 07:08 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mj4raguhd22thttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mj4omfu4h22t10 Apr 2026 06:21 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mj4omfu4h22thttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3miqzskpqok2dMeta Horizon is hardly beloved, but somehow, the threat that it was closing engendered enough of a response that Meta backed off and put it in maintenance mode instead. Telling, I think, that no such mild grassroots response rose up to "Save Sora." [contains quote post or other embedded content]05 Apr 2026 15:09 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3miqzskpqok2dhttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3miq4sydlts2d@nytpitchbot.bsky.social How did you pull this off?05 Apr 2026 06:31 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3miq4sydlts2dhttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3minjzvhkvc25Everybody's moving real fast, and shit's breaking.04 Apr 2026 05:49 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3minjzvhkvc25https://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mijmh3lgoc2302 Apr 2026 16:22 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mijmh3lgoc23https://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3miavhx5ads27Someday, every member of this administration will realize they were chosen for their role for the specific reasons that they were (1) willing to commit crimes that will put them in jail long after Trump is dead, and (2) dumb enough to believe he would take proactive steps to protect them from that. [contains quote post or other embedded content]30 Mar 2026 05:09 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3miavhx5ads27https://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3miatyxuaxs27It's time for an ambitious Democrat to run for President by saying that if a class of people who have ever paid student loans were to sue the government, as President, they would direct the DOJ to settle for the amount of all their loans, a thing SCOTUS is self evidently fine with Presidents doing. [contains quote post or other embedded content]30 Mar 2026 04:43 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3miatyxuaxs27https://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mi3vhlb72k2sI can see people being ambivalent about Collins losing, in part because she's a Squish, and I'll say this: there are always, ALWAYS, about two Squishes in each caucus. If one leaves or is voted out, another squish will self-select into existence from the caucus, and you'll still have a Squish.28 Mar 2026 05:26 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mi3vhlb72k2shttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mhzhrtggf22tFun Quiz! This NYT article was written: A. Monday. B. Monday a week ago. C. Monday two weeks ago.27 Mar 2026 06:16 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mhzhrtggf22thttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mhww2epols2hWere you planning to go to sleep before you read this? https://marvel.fandom.com/wiki/Jesus_of_Nazareth_(Earth-616)26 Mar 2026 05:53 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mhww2epols2hhttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mht3sz7ns224Remember when all you Doomers said it was stupid for Democrats to cave on the government shutdown, because giving Trump a funded-forever private military entirely under his command in exchange for a show vote on healthcare subsidies that was sure to lose was political suicide? Great call, Doomers!24 Mar 2026 17:26 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mht3sz7ns224https://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mhj2rtj4vs2nJust months away from an insurance company going to court to argue whether Trump is, in fact, a God.20 Mar 2026 17:40 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mhj2rtj4vs2nhttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mhf3nq7w3k2eI remember being exasperated with the "debates" in 2002-2003 between conservatives and liberals about whether the war with Iraq was justified based on the flimsy evidence presented, and thinking if Republicans would accept THIS rationale for war they'd accept ANY, in fact NO rationale, and well.19 Mar 2026 03:45 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mhf3nq7w3k2ehttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mhelqjcb7c2eWhat statement by your masseuse indicates that your massage is not going to be relaxing? As of this week, mine is "A lot of important stuff happens in the animated Star Wars shows."18 Mar 2026 23:01 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mhelqjcb7c2ehttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mhe5o42pv22eBig tech companies cutting their workforce-- at this moment, as the biggest force multiplier in the history of software engineering is rapidly accelerating-- are cowards.18 Mar 2026 18:49 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mhe5o42pv22ehttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mgwprlt6ic2sMe in 2023: I wish there was a Star Trek series produced by HBO. That'd be amazing. Monkey's Paw: *curls* Me in 2023: These Shein monkey's paws don't last for shit. Thank God I bought forty of them.13 Mar 2026 10:35 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mgwprlt6ic2shttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mgvvnxqpmk2gIf you see this, share your Smash Bros main [contains quote post or other embedded content]13 Mar 2026 02:48 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mgvvnxqpmk2ghttps://bsky.app/profile/baj.bsky.social/post/3mgth2s7wuc2eGlad I got my warp back to working.12 Mar 2026 03:22 +0000at://did:plc:lmn5they6nvb3hb3do7ahemx/app.bsky.feed.post/3mgth2s7wuc2e