just here to have fun onlinehttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.onlinehttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mm3t7vt2lc2hgoddammit. someone stole my wallet and bought a racing sim wheel. they shipped it directly to my fucking house. humiliating. well, I can’t return it,18 May 2026 02:26 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mm3t7vt2lc2hhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mm2sk5lwd22oWe’re officially on HOT MUSTARD DORITO WATCH. The FRITO-LAY SNACK CONGLOMERATE, despite inventing the GREATEST DORITO FLAVOR SINCE “COOL RANCH,” seems intent on QUIETLY BURYING THE PRODUCT despite an ENGAGED AND RAVENOUS PUBLIC LOUDLY CLAMORING for their IMMEDIATE RETURN!17 May 2026 16:42 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mm2sk5lwd22ohttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mm2levpe7s26didn’t Plan B become widely available around the same year as the iPhone? [contains quote post or other embedded content]17 May 2026 14:33 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mm2levpe7s26https://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlzn7esnek2nborrowing a time machine to break john lennon’s confidence by singing every song he wrote in front of him a month before he writes it17 May 2026 05:33 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlzn7esnek2nhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlz4cfezxc2dI fucking knew he wasn’t real [contains quote post or other embedded content]17 May 2026 00:31 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlz4cfezxc2dhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlz3tozqe22dreciting this with my children before hopping in my F-150 Raptor and taking the long way to Applebee’s to avoid the street where last week my cousin saw an “ethnic” [contains quote post or other embedded content]17 May 2026 00:23 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlz3tozqe22dhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlwruy4vc22wget daniel day-lewis for a one-off bond dark knight returns type thing. then some kid nobody knows who can act his ass off [contains quote post or other embedded content]16 May 2026 02:19 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlwruy4vc22whttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlw5ltn7yk2ftook a break from online today to inoculate a mushroom bed on the side of the house. some of you need to worry less about "my social networks" and more about "mycelial networks"15 May 2026 20:16 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlw5ltn7yk2fhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlvuakvb6c2fdo you think the mafia uses jira? does the mafia have an annual subscription to monday dot com?15 May 2026 17:29 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlvuakvb6c2fhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlvtt2jlxk2fit's happening again [contains quote post or other embedded content]15 May 2026 17:21 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlvtt2jlxk2fhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlvnveqb622frough first day at the Horizon Festival: accidentally obliterated a city employee attempting to race a 747 through a residential neighborhood. was feeling pretty broken up about it but a guy from the government(?) drifted by in an RX-7 and said it was fine15 May 2026 15:35 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlvnveqb622fhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mluhzeo6e22cI wonder how it feels to go to bed at night thinking about how you recorded a snarky down-the-barrel takedown of a program costing 30x less than your boss’s second wedding that helps little babies. I wonder if you feel a little sad, a little empty. I wonder if you feel anything at all [contains quote post or other embedded content]15 May 2026 04:17 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mluhzeo6e22chttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mltq62lzf22agetting jump scared more and more as I approach forty by looking up a song I enjoyed from the radio and finding out it’s by steely dan14 May 2026 21:10 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mltq62lzf22ahttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlsxszat3k2udystopian. researchers should not be contracting with shady brokers for private health data. they should be supporting small mom-and-pop shit photo operations like mine [contains quote post or other embedded content]14 May 2026 13:55 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlsxszat3k2uhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlqtt3lmoc2wthe beauty of this website is that every morning you can wake up to a new bloody civil war with absolutely no indication whether it was incited by someone saying “silk boxers are mid” or “I believe you should be allowed to eat any dog under ten pounds”13 May 2026 17:38 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlqtt3lmoc2whttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlpluekdyk24despicable of course but also it’s wild that the “If CANDIDATE can’t be honest about ISSUE” framing is still being trotted out in 2026. it’s like being served hamburger helper. like, damn, people still love this shit huh [contains quote post or other embedded content]13 May 2026 05:43 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlpluekdyk24https://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlotf4ojnk24no, babe. you’re not “defending western civilization.” you are a dip shit12 May 2026 22:25 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlotf4ojnk24https://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlofnrwmgc26stay for trump almost saying the r-slur on the news [contains quote post or other embedded content]12 May 2026 18:19 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlofnrwmgc26https://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlo3dqc3dc26hey 👋 I'm that PM from work who sends last minute meeting invites for 8am. scheduling a group this big is tough, haha, appreciate the flexibility! looking forward to seeing everybody online bright and early, just in time for me to cancel the meeting at 7:5512 May 2026 15:14 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlo3dqc3dc26https://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlmui4fafk2vexercising after the kids go to bed is really eating into my ice cream sandwich time12 May 2026 03:39 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlmui4fafk2vhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlmocb4uic2lI was charged $28 for a gin and tonic in Santa Clara and haven’t been back to California since [contains quote post or other embedded content]12 May 2026 01:48 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlmocb4uic2lhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlmncjnsos2lmy favorite thing about Species (1995) is that some lady in Puerto Rico was watching Species and was like, “this is real.” and that’s how the chupacabra got invented [contains quote post or other embedded content]12 May 2026 01:31 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlmncjnsos2lhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mllufto4yc26the "Most Millennial Song" discourse is fundamentally flawed. the "Most Millennial Song" is not going to be a song released by a commercial artist that received significant airplay. it's a youtube mashup. specifically this one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5LzIS360q-M11 May 2026 18:05 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mllufto4yc26https://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mllp2u2lcc26Now that this is in the news, I'm excited to finally announce that I am starring in "Paper Rush: A Fast and the Furious Tale" for NBC, which tells the story of the brave loan officers who help the heroes of the franchise buy all of their Skyline GT-Rs at 27.9% APR [contains quote post or other embedded content]11 May 2026 16:29 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mllp2u2lcc26https://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlkhdh3m322ythe only thing preventing the production of a 1km long twizzler is cowardice11 May 2026 04:38 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlkhdh3m322yhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlj2a5myts2lthis country’s obsession with presidents born before the invention of the transistor has lead to our current reality of having to spend the last decade watching them decompose on live television while the world spirals into armageddon [contains quote post or other embedded content]10 May 2026 15:11 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlj2a5myts2lhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlizegjanc2lthe world is a better place with so many milfs in it. that’s just the truth, and I don’t think we should hide from the truth10 May 2026 14:56 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlizegjanc2lhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mlgvtzicxk2uarrived home to discover the pleasant silence in the back seat was caused primarily by my five year old writing “67” on her baby sister’s forehead with a ballpoint pen09 May 2026 18:48 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mlgvtzicxk2uhttps://bsky.app/profile/ceej.online/post/3mle4v3pyss22 [contains quote post or other embedded content]08 May 2026 16:15 +0000at://did:plc:mm5ebihpjvtrdunomulbls5m/app.bsky.feed.post/3mle4v3pyss22