Guitarist in Ground Zero. Instagram: @GroundZeroBlackpool If you like my jokes, I will follow you. And you will like it. Aspiring novelist. "Cube" out now! https://shop.ingramspark.com/b/084?params=an5FOn1ewei2zvEbELzoNc7iWelbGxeUrmark9VSNrDhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.socialhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mvkg4wtj5s2aI still think the best rail replacement service is actual rails. #humour #humoursky15 Sep 2026 10:29 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mvkg4wtj5s2ahttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mvdlmpjx3c2uI went into a church with a sign outside reading "All welcome". The guy said "You can't come in". I said "Your sign says All welcome" He said "Yes, but your name's not 'All'!" #humour #humoursky12 Sep 2026 17:18 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mvdlmpjx3c2uhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mva7jf72ik2kIf you're going to stick it to the man, be sure to source the correct adhesive. #humour #humoursky11 Sep 2026 09:04 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mva7jf72ik2khttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3muzwkwxh5s2oI'm sorry, but how, and I mean this in the strongest possible terms, the actual F*** did Mrs. Browns Boys win an award at the NTA?? JFC. #NTA08 Sep 2026 21:08 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3muzwkwxh5s2ohttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3muyozd3rtc2c#ASongOrMovieForFoodNames I Believe in a Thing Called Loaf https://static.klipy.com/ii/4e7bea9f7a3371424e6c16ebc93252fe/30/e0/TYbcXTxG6ynaf3ms.gif?hh=280&ww=498&mp4=7jJSJUuE8noUwvULE6&webm=VGQylHm9w8l3t608 Sep 2026 09:20 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3muyozd3rtc2chttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3muxpkynyrc2d"Hello and welcome to the paranoia help line. There is a big queue and they're ALL BEHIND YOU. RUN!!!" #humour #humoursky07 Sep 2026 23:57 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3muxpkynyrc2dhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3muxoyv4xec2d"One day son, all this will be yours" "What, the whole chocolate bar?" #humour #humoursky07 Sep 2026 23:47 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3muxoyv4xec2dhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3muwslj2rn22yI've renamed Instagram as Cats.07 Sep 2026 15:18 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3muwslj2rn22yhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3muwrslyw522yPoll: Is this poll useless because I'm bored? Reply: 1 if "Yes" 2 if "Affirmative" 3 if "Positively so" 4 if "Absolutely"07 Sep 2026 15:04 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3muwrslyw522yhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3murzihdjgs2vHold your next picnic within a group of people practicing martial arts to keep wasps and flies away. #humour #humoursky05 Sep 2026 17:39 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3murzihdjgs2vhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3murmkbnk2c2eAt my local restaurant, I went for the early bird menu and was served worms. #humour #humoursky05 Sep 2026 13:47 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3murmkbnk2c2ehttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mumodz7gbs2kWe did the jigsaw...then visited.03 Sep 2026 14:36 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mumodz7gbs2khttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mumildjln22rI drove through road works today and there were workmen. Not only that, they were WORKING. Has the world gone mad?!? #humour #humoursky03 Sep 2026 12:53 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mumildjln22rhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mumgxaiml22uVegans practice the ancient martial art of To Fu. #humour #humoursky03 Sep 2026 12:24 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mumgxaiml22uhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mumfv3av3c25I used to be really active and keep fit, but now I put my back out if I blink too hard. #humour #humoursky03 Sep 2026 12:05 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mumfv3av3c25https://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mul4dwql2223The collective term for a group of murderers is a crow. #humour #humoursky02 Sep 2026 23:41 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mul4dwql2223https://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3muhduvvqyk2bI gave my mate laxatives laced with Nitrous Oxide just for sh*ts and giggles! #humour #humoursky01 Sep 2026 11:45 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3muhduvvqyk2bhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3muhdmdyvfs25Woohoo! My team lost! Wait, that's wrong. Woohoo! The other team won! There. That's better. #humour #humoursky01 Sep 2026 11:41 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3muhdmdyvfs25https://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mufjyefegs2kFeeling happy today. He quite likes it. #humour #humoursky31 Aug 2026 18:29 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mufjyefegs2khttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3muekhl6eo22zIn space, no one can hear ice cream. #humour #humoursky31 Aug 2026 09:05 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3muekhl6eo22zhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mudtlvarc22pMy local garden center is preparing for its Christmas display. You know what that means? It'll soon be Easter. #humour #humoursky31 Aug 2026 02:16 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mudtlvarc22phttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mucxusgzfk2fA few clips and pics of us yesterday at The Saddle Music Festival. I'm the idiot on the right😁 IG link: https://www.instagram.com/p/Dcq62jGgivd/?igsi=MW53ZTd0a2p1ODd5Nw==30 Aug 2026 18:00 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mucxusgzfk2fhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mucuix4sz22mMight join Twitter again, just for the sheer enjoyment of leaving.30 Aug 2026 17:00 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mucuix4sz22mhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mucucqwmss2mWhere's Wally, but in the dark.30 Aug 2026 16:56 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mucucqwmss2mhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mucnsi4yxc2uIt didn't bother me that my nasal graft operation was cancelled. It's no skin off my nose. #humour #humoursky30 Aug 2026 15:00 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mucnsi4yxc2uhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3muaef2lzb224This really should have been a Delorean.29 Aug 2026 17:06 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3muaef2lzb224https://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mu6bpiecyk2bWell, that's the last time I'll ever say gazumped.28 Aug 2026 21:13 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mu6bpiecyk2bhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mu5hbxq7os2hWere playing Saturday 2pm. If you can get down, do it!28 Aug 2026 13:20 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mu5hbxq7os2hhttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mu4cv6nxo22kRamekin: The Egyptian god of baking. #humour #humoursky28 Aug 2026 02:28 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mu4cv6nxo22khttps://bsky.app/profile/johnnydcm.bsky.social/post/3mu3opek2c225Today's word is Escutcheon.27 Aug 2026 20:27 +0000at://did:plc:ta2bbqqk25mehnhziypo7j5u/app.bsky.feed.post/3mu3opek2c225